Pengalaman Melahirkan Anak di Hospital Ampang, Selangor

24th June 2016 -
My contraction pain was getting more intense and more frequent. My husband brought me to Hospital Ampang @ PAC at around 3 am.
The Doctor checked me for at least 30 mins. He informed that I was 6 cm dilated, so he broke my water bag to make the process quicker. After my water bag has been broken he checked again and said I was already 7 cm dilated. I literally couldn't walk at that point but the nurse requested me to change into hospital clothing. The nurse brought me to labor room in wheel chair after informing my husband. As I laid on the labor room bed, another nurse saw me holding my breath cause of the pain. She asked me if I felt like I needed to poop, I said I don't know.. the pain was getting stronger and more frequent.
I heard my husband asking for me outside the labor room but he wasn't allowed to enter as the nurse said the Doctor need to be here first. More than anything I needed my husband to be my side. It was ridiculous that the Doctor needed to see me first before my husband! Anyway... after a while the doctor didn't show up.. at this point many nurses was in the labor room trying to reach the Doctor by phone. Some said she might be sleeping and apparently the CTG reading was not ok. Then luckily some nurse allowed my husband to enter the labor room.. So he sat by my side. One nurse checked my dilation and the pain got even worse because she was playing around her finger inside me!! I kept saying.. "Sakittttt" but all the nurse didn't bother. Later while her finger was still playing around inside me she said if I needed to push then just push without instructing me to be "in position" to push.. the nurse kept saying "nak teran teran la.. Nak teran teran la.." eyes on ctg. Rasa nak lempang je muka dia. I tried to push... the pain was sooo horrible. The Doctor (Kak Jam) finally arrived. She quickly took over and checked my dilation and said I am only 6 cm dilated.. which was seriously impossible!!! I wanted to push the baby out already so how can it be 6 cm? From my previous experience, when I felt like pushing (teran) it was already 8 cm. So mine has to be like 8-9 cm that time. Plus @ PAC already confirmed I was 7 cm before sending me to labor room. Then the Doctor informed me and my husband that I have to be operated because my dilation is only 6 cm and the baby's heart beat is slowing down. I couldn't think of anything at that point cause of the pain. I just wanted the pain to go away. I signed the paper anyhow to agree to get operated. The nurses then pushed me in wheeled bed.. My feet was out of the bed, they asked me to get up and put it inside. I couldn't do it!!! I just couldn't!!! I was pushing the baby out. That's what I felt like doing.. Push push and just pushhhhh. However all the nurses was saying "Puan jgn teran Puan". How can I stop pushing??? We reached at OT. Again have to sign on some papers before they bring me in. This time I have to switch bed. Guess what?? None of the nurse helped me but they kept saying.. "Puan bangun Puan, tukar katil Puan". How on earth can I do that on my own????!!! None of the nurses offered their hand to support me at least. The pain was extremely painful I just couldn't move and kept squeezing the bed handle. Finally they said to my husband to ask me to switch bed. My husband came and supported me to switch bed.
Then I got to OT.. Nurses quickly undress me leaving me with a cloth on top of me. The Doctor who was about to operate me, checked my dilation.. She said surprisingly that the baby's head is already there.. I can push... She motivated me to push. She kept saying you can do it Puan.. yes yes a bit more.. take a deep breath and push... and I did! and the baby was born @ 5:40 am.
The labor room Doctor (Kak Jam) made a huge mistake! I wasn't 6 cm dilated after all. Probably 9cm!!!
So yeah this was my worst experience delivering baby at Hospital Ampang.
Before deciding to deliver at Hospital Ampang, I have read all the reviews and apparently no bad reviews at all. So I really thought they have tip top service. But unfortunately not for me. The worst labor room nurses and doctor ever!!!

Self-reminder Part 1

Stuffs that affects a person's esteem level which may lead to depression and worse case scenario is severe mental illness..

1. Someone being over friendly with you.. and at the back that "someone" talks bad about you. (To some extend you can feel your heart squeezing so bad because you were totally sincere with that "someone"). It hurts really bad.. so please don't do it.

2. Snapping or bashing on someone very close to you without confirming the truth. (Seriously this is one of the craziest thing that I have experience. I was literally shaking when someone very close to me snapped and accused me for something I wasn't even aware of). Be confirmed... like really really confirmed that you are snapping on a person for their wrong doing. If you are not confirm might as well just stay quiet or just simply confront the person nicely. Don't be selfish and hurt people's feelings.

3. No one knows what everyone is going through. But certainly everyone on this planet have PROBLEMS. Whether big or small every single person go through it. So please do not assume people don't have problems. The difference is only some people like sharing with the rest of the world and some people do not like to bother others with their problems. So always be considerate with others no matter what. 

4. If you are nice to a person make sure you really really mean it. Don't do it for the sake of "attention". Sooner or later you will lose everything.

5. Don't be rude especially with elders no matter you are right or wrong or no matter what the situation is. Being rude simply says many negative things about you. Why should you portray yourself that way?

.....

Living with Bipolarian

Everyday is unpredictable.
Everyday is unpredictable.
Everyday is unpredictable.

There are days of highs,
there are days of lows.
Highs and lows, highs and lows, 
high and lows.
They never stop. Never.

Some days lows stays longer.
Some days highs stays longer.
I prefer to be with the highs than the lows.
The lows is full of shit.
Whereas the highs is full of life.

The lows makes me sad.
The lows makes me depressed.
The lows makes me cry.
The lows makes me mad.
The lows hurts me bad. Real bad.

When the highs come, I finally get to breathe.
Breathe, breathe and breathe.
Breathe of freedom.
Breathe of happiness.
Freedom to love him the way I want.
Freedom to speak my mind.
Being loved by him..
as though we just fell in love.
The best part.

But highs does not stay very long.
It goes away after a couple of days or more.

So....

Back to sadness again.
Back to depression again.
Back to crying again.

...and then it starts all over again.

What is Bipolar?

Has anyone ever heard of Bipolar disorder?

I remembered watching Oprah - Bipolar episode few years back.. That's how I initially know about this disorder.

A person who is suffering from Bipolar disorder basically exhibit two identities. At least that is how I describe it as. Excessive happiness and excessive depressive mode. For some reason they are unable to control these two mood swings. In severe cases, they develop a pattern e.g. Mon to Wed/Thurs would be depressive mode, Thurs/Fri - Sunday would be excessive happiness mode which also known as Mania. 

In depressive episode, they tend to feel empty inside, severe depression. Sometimes (most of the time actually) they talk roughly or rudely to others for no reason. They feel extremely lazy and can sleep all day and night - always sleepy. They are easily irritated, and when triggered.. they explode like nobody else.Their behavior is extremely negative and people who doesn't know of this disorder will automatically dislike this person. This affects their relationships, work, etc. Thus, family members especially should pay more attention to the person who is suffering from this. Do not trigger them and try to give them full support. Otherwise the symptom will only get worse and worse since they have no clue about this.

In mania episode, it's the opposite of all those I said above here. Yes, the mood swings is that severe, from one end to the other end. Their voice itself tend to be softer and they're very polite even with strangers! They would be so hardworking that it's like they're moving non-stop. They sleep only for a few hours at night or sometimes they go on without any sleep and yet they are active and positive. Everybody loves this person. 

This pattern will continue from week to week, month to month, and gets worse without any consultation or medication. Hence, to be aware of this disorder is important. Anyone around us can be suffering from this and we may look at this person differently now if we are aware of it. Most cases, the symptoms goes unnoticed for a long long time.

Thankfully I was aware of this disorder and managed to diagnosed and gave awareness to somebody who is very important to me. Though it took 4+ years.

Yes, yes, yes.. I am finally relieved. I have the answer to my major problem now. I just need to learn how to deal with it and help the person to become better.

Thank You Allah.

Cookies and Cream Cupcakes

I had a package of Oreo cookies that I have been waiting to use for a while now. I think since February. I know. I know. Unheard of. But, I was planning on using them for a Valentine’s treat, and for whatever reason… I can’t remember now… I didn’t. And on top of that, I’m not much of a snacker, so they’ve just been sitting on my counter as a constant reminder that I need to make something with them.

So this weekend I decided a good way to get rid of them all would be to make Cookies and Cream Cupcakes with cookies in and on top of the cupcakes.

So I got busy baking.

First the flour.

Then the sugar.

And cocoa.

Soda, salt and powder.

A quick whisk together. Fluffy and pretty.

Forgive me for all the close-up photos, but I just think the ingredients look so luxurious.

Next, add the milk, eggs, oil and vanilla and mix all together before adding the hot water.

You can fill the cupcakes with cookies two different ways.

With broken cookie pieces or with one whole cookie.

Then add the batter and bake.

Oooh. I like the look of these.

Yes, yes I do.

All they need is a little frosting.

Or a lot.

I usually make frosting with butter and powdered sugar, but for these, I tried it with shortening instead of the butter. I wanted to make sure the frosting came out white instead of off white. It looks prettier against the cookies and shows off the crumbs that are mixed with it. But I still like regular buttercream best.

Top each cupcake off with a whole cookie.

You can also apply the frosting in a mounded shape and dunk them in a bowl of cookie crumbs to coat. These cupcakes have the whole Oreos inside.

Just place a cookie in the bottom of each baking cup. The batter I used was very liquid. I thought they would stay on the bottom of the baking cup, but they actually rose to the surface before they went in the oven.

And I liked how they looked when they baked that way.

Now I just need some milk. Yum!

Cookies and Cream Cupcakes

Cupcakes:
1 1/2 cups all purpose flour
1/2 cup natural unsweetened cocoa
1 1/4 cup sugar
3/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 eggs
1/2 cup vegetable oil
1 teaspoon vanilla
3/4 cup milk
3/4 cup hot water
24 Oreos, plus more for crumbs

Frosting:
1 cup shortening
1 lb. powdered sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla
3-6 Tablespoons milk
2 or more teaspoons Oreo cookie crumbs

For the cupcakes:

• Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
• Line tray with 12 baking cups.
• Place one whole cookie in each cup or break apart at least 12 cookies and place the broken pieces into each cup.
• Mix the flour, cocoa, sugar, baking soda, baking powder and salt in a large mixing bowl using a wire whisk.
• Add the eggs, oil, vanilla and milk and mix well until thoroughly combined. Add the hot water and mix until combined.
• Transfer the batter (it will be very liquid) to a large measuring cup and then pour batter into each baking cup so it’s about three quarters full. You should have a little left over.
• Bake for 16-18 minutes.

Makes at least 12 cupcakes

For the frosting:

• Beat the shortening in a mixer until smooth.
• Add vanilla and mix until combined.
• Add the powdered sugar in three additions, scraping down the sides after each addition.
• Add a Tablespoon of milk at a time and mix together until you achieve the consistency you like.
• Add the cookie crumbs and mix until completely combined. You can add more if you like, but I just wanted a light speckling to show off the white frosting.
• Place frosting in a decorator bag with a 1M tip and swirl on top of each cupcake.
• Insert a cookie on top of each cupcake.
• You can also apply frosting on each cupcake in a mounded shape. Turn upside down and roll the top around in a small bowl of cookie crumbs to coat.

Note: If you choose to pile the frosting on high like I’ve shown here, you should double this recipe to make sure you have enough.

Enjoy!

Shahrukh Khan's Kids Pictures - Aryan & Suhana

Pembikin Filem Anti-Islam Tidak Menyesal Hina Nabi

NEW YORK – Seorang penganut Kristian Koptik kelahiran Mesir yang menghasilkan filem anti-Islam dan mencetuskan protes di seluruh dunia Islam menyatakan dia tidak menyesal menghina Nabi Muhammad SAW, menurut satu temu ramahnya dengan akhbar New York Times.

Dalam komen umum pertama sejak filem berdurasi selama 14 minit bertajuk Innocence of Muslims mencetuskan kemarahan pada September lalu, penganut Kristian tersebut, Mark Basseley Youssef memberitahu New York Times, dia mahu mendedahkan apa yang digelarnya ‘kebenaran sebenar’ dan meningkatkan kesedaran mengenai keganasan yang dilakukan atas nama Tuhan.

Filem itu turut menyentuh tentang sentimen anti-Amerika di negara Arab dan dunia Islam.

Youssef menjelaskan punca di sebalik pembikinan filem tersebut adalah kerana kekejaman penganut Islam itu sendiri.

Ia dihasilkan selepas insiden seorang lelaki Islam membunuh 13 orang di Fort Hood, Texas pada 2009.

Kejadian itu menyebabkan dia berasa semakin marah.

Temu ramah itu dijalankan secara bertulis menerusi peguamnya.

“Saya fikir, sebelum skrip filem itu ditulis, saya patut membakar diri sendiri di tengah-tengah orang ramai supaya rakyat Amerika dan dunia tahu mesej yang ingin saya sampaikan,” kata Youssef.

Youssef yang turut dikenali sebagai Nakoula Basseley Nakoula dikenakan hukuman penjara selama setahun kerana melanggar peraturan pembebasannya dari penjara atas kesalahan menipu bank. – Reuters